Ebbing Into The Ocean

Argh it's Thursday - that means no lesson days till Monday! But it also means I have a good break to work on the power chords and really try to get them better, to work on my new song which is ..... ! And to work on the song Tom just gave me to learn on guitar.

This is what I'm up against... I'm sure you'll see why my confidence is so fragile but also why I push myself so hard. Right, we're in the lesson and Tom creates a song for me to learn on guitar, nothing too complicated just a mix of all the stuff we've been doing (strumming, funky fingerstyle soloing, double stops ect), I say nothing too complicated but it's still going to take a bucketload of effort to play it, then he records it so I can play over it. He then sits and creates a drum track on staff pad (bare in mind I'm having a breakdown over drums right now!!) and then proceeds to lay down some very 'very' cool bass and piano on the spot. You had to be there really but he paused, cocked his head, listened, I could see light bulbs going on then bam he just plays it. And the whole thing sounds cool! It was inspiring, very very inspiring.

Then there is.... me! I have a total mess of a song. I've no idea where I'm going with it, no structure, not even a sniff of an idea what I'm going to do on bass, no idea how to make those sodding drums work. Days if not weeks of work depending how fast my brain churns to produce something that won't sound half as good as what this awesome guy can do 'on the spot'.

Y e a h........

Now my brain tells me that's the 20 years experience that he has over me and I get that, totally, but when I see it in action it's so hard to believe I'll ever get there. If I do.... ohhhhh wow, no one ever in the history of the world will ever have been as happy that's guaranteed! In the meantime I just have to sit in my little rowboat in this big ocean and paddle like crazy (I so see a doodle in that image) because that's the only way I'll get there. Yesterday I was having one of my crisis of faith days, they're usually bad days to have lessons on but actually I came away feeling encouraged although I have no idea why because he intimidated the hell out of me. I'm so in awe of these two men, hopefully though one day I'll earn their respect too (on a musical level).

I know I promised you a sniff of the new song today but give me a smidge more time because it's soooo raw now. I will put something up soon I promise, I just want you to get an accurate idea where it's going and right now it's still too many ideas bundled.